How to Avoid Confrontation

I am one of those individuals that HATE drama. From childhood, I would always make a fervent effort to avoid arguments or involvement in people’s personal business. Thus, I am proud to say that in all 18 years of my life, I have lived a relatively drama free life. Thank God. Drama and fighting can deteriorate and wear out your soul. It is unnecessary and can almost always be avoided. As I started college I had to be conscious of the fact that I would be interacting with a montage of people. These people would be coming from different backgrounds, cultures, religions, and parts of the world. Therefore, misunderstandings would not be uncommon. So, with the help of my friends and family I am learning how to deal with different kinds of people and avoiding drama in the meantime. So here are some of my tips on how to avoid confrontation.

  1. Talk it out. Communication issues are one of the number one reasons as to why people get into disagreements. Communication is vital in any type of relationship. A relationship without communication is like a car without gas. Useless. So first things first, you have to learn how to talk to people. When talking to others, especially new people, make sure to be polite. Avoid questionable commentary. Avoid vulgar language. Try not to bring up controversial topics. This is all necessary to build the beginning foundations of a relationship. Furthermore, it is important to avoid discussing things that might be sensitive via phone. Sometimes talking through text can cause misunderstandings. You are not fully able to convey your emotions through text lingo and emojis. So, if there is something important you need to share, make sure you do it in person.
  2. Don’t rock the boat. If you know what pushes someone’s buttons, don’t try to push those buttons. Maybe talking to your friend about how bad her boyfriend is, might not be the best idea. Yes, you should be an honest friend. I’m totally down for that. However,  when talking about controversial topics, be sensitive. Watch the tone of your voice. Take precaution about your word choice.  Don’t try to be a parent figure. What I mean by this is that if you are trying to talk to your friend about an issue, don’t try to lecture them. Make a friendly and inviting atmosphere.
  3. Compromise. I can’t stress how important compromise is for avoiding a fight. For example, me and my roommate got into a disagreement about an issue. We resolved it by coming to a compromise. When you compromise it is a win-win situation. You will be able to get a little bit of what you want, while the other person gets the same.The solution is fair for everyone.
  4.  Don’t be an instigator. This goes along with the communication situation. Watch your mouth. Think, am I starting some unnecessary drama by making this comment? If you are, then don’t say it. It’s not worth the fight. Also, avoid people who tend to have their lives revolving and thriving on drama. Instigators will get you in trouble. People like that cannot find anything better to do with their time then to be dramatic. Eliminate that toxicity from your life.

Well, that’s all that I have for today. I hope you find these tips helpful.   Thanks for reading.

Stay Fabulous,

Abisola